so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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