She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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