He asked to "fluff my boner.."
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
