WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize