She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
