You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize