I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
