drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Someone signed my nipple.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize