i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize
