Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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