Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Randomize
