I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
lets start a swedish sibling band together
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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