2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize