just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
how does that bad decision feel?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize