Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
