I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
