ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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