at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
