this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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