Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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