i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone