Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
