whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
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