i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
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