i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
