like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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