there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
