I bet he comes in French.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
