I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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