Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
As shirtless as possible
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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