return my video game
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
