I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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