Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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