whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize