I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
