i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
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