We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
