Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
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