# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
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