we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
