I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
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