You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
bring money and cleavage
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
