I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Randomize
