"it" just moved
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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