Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
