I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
