My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
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