Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
