weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
