Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
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