Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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