2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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